Tony Robbins, a famous success coach once said ‘the quality of our lives is directly proportional to the quality of relationships we have in our lives’.
Before we get started
by Carl Massy: It is not that I am short, it is just that Pete is tall. Actually after living in Asia for the last 7 years, I was initially overwhelmed by how frikkin tall all the lads were at the reunion. I have got too used to being ‘average’ height in Asia. Lucky that good things, when small, are twice as good (and I like to think I also have a heart the since of a large watermelon). 😉
Quality relationships light us up. They energize us. They inspire us. They encourage us to show up in bigger and better ways. They support us. They give us perspective. They entertain us. They even improve the quality of our health (unless of course you drink a dozen beers every time you meet ;-)).
We all know this, at some level. But we forget to practice it. We get complacent. We take our friends for granted. We settle for virtual interactions with televisions and internet ‘stuff’ and forget the joys and pleasure of real face-to-face, voice-to-voice and person-to-person relationships. We need to recognize the value and then make the time to foster these ‘priceless’ relationships in our lives.
The other side of the coin
I often ask in my seminars which is a greater risk factor for coronary heart disease, out of ‘loneliness’ and ‘smoking’? Did you know according to research they are pretty much the same? So loneliness, or the feeling or deep disconnection, is actually highly detrimental to your health.
Just as loneliness is at one end of the spectrum, with the relevant health impacts, quality relationships are at the other end. They enhance your health. They increase your longevity and vitality. They are essential to optimum health and definitely worth going out of your way for.
A great story from my 25-year reunion (from the Royal Military College Duntroon)
One of the lads I met at the reunion, I had not seen for 25 years. In fact he had not seen any of us guys in the same company group for 25-years. When he first walked in the room he was overwhelmed with emotion as he said ‘I can’t believe I am actually here with you guys.’ It was a pretty amazing experience for us all.
I also got to talking with him and he told me that because he left because of personal reasons before graduating, he has always carried around with him a sense of failure, incompleteness and some unprocessed emotions. So his meeting and talking with us all after 25-years actually gave him some powerful closure and perspective. It was awesome to see. And when I told him how much trouble I got into as a junior officer (almost to the point of being asked to take a one-way ticket to some other profession), he realised that maybe he was not such a ratbag after all.
So this is the potential when we reach out and make the effort to connect with our friends.
So my challenge for you – right now
Once you finish reading this (and sending me an email to thank me for the reminder); I want you to think of someone who you have not spoken to, or seen, for ages.
Then get in touch with them.
And finally, organise to really catch up with them. In person is ALWAYS preferable. But if that is absolutely not possible, then coordinate with them to block out 1-2 hours of uninterrupted time to have a really long chat with them (Skype to Skype is even free). Find out what they are up to. What their future plans are. How their family is. How they are. Help out if you can. Let them know that you care and you are there if they ever need you.
It will make a difference to them, and I can guarantee, it will make a (HUGE) difference for you too.
Connecting with people in a meaningful and heartfelt way is one of the keys to happiness. So what are you waiting for??? 😉
And if you haven’t figured it out – I am on the far right of the photo; with a very high and tight haircut. What a journey!
If ever you ever need a hand dumping any excess baggage you might be carrying around (for way too long) don’t hesitate to get in touch. We won’t only dump the excess, we will also start looking at how you can tap into and get the very most out of the potential you have inside. Here’s to co-creating your amazing future!
Just reply to this email to find out more or check out www.CarlMassy.com