By Carl Massy: As you know I have been working on unpacking the money thing for the last week plus and it is pretty interesting what has been coming up. And the reality is, the money thing is caught up with the self-worth thing, the self-love thing, the picked up some shocking beliefs when I was a wee lass thing, and a whole heap of other ‘stuff’.
This is what I want to share
Essentially if you are not where you want to be in life, and are not on a clear path where each step is taking you closer to this desired destination, you can be pretty sure there is a story, or belief, that is creating an obstacle in your way. It can be as little as a speed bump or maybe more like the Grand Canyon.
Most personal development and motivation teachers tell you to stay super focused on what you want in life. Get excited about it. See it. Make a vision board of it. Do your mantra’s. And a host of other things.
When life throws you a curve ball and distracts you (which it often does), you switch straight back into autopilot. You go back to operating from your old beliefs. The belief that says you don’t deserve, or you will never make it, or you are not smart enough, etc.
Keep seeing your beliefs and stories as just that: stories that you bought into at some time. They are not true. They are not Universal Laws. Challenge them. Pick holes in them. Debunk them. Flip them the bird. 😉
UPGRADE them by saying, “How would I choose to think and feel?”
Changing beliefs is the No 1 best way to change the results you get in life. You are working on root cause when you work with your beliefs.
My Interesting (and very useful) Tips
Here are some pointers I recommend for you:
• Become aware of the stories you are telling yourself. Once you become aware you can CHOOSE to listen to them or CHOOSE a new story. You are in control of your attention. Where attention goes, energy flows.
• Be compassionate with yourself. Don’t beat yourself up for having crappy beliefs. Accept that we all have some shockers. Have fun comparing your worst ones with your friends. One of my worst was: Someone is better than me if they are older / wealthier / more educated / higher position / etc. Talk about putting me into a stress response and making me too nervous to show up as my best self when meeting these people. My newbie is: “I am equal to the best”.
• This is a long term project. Set yourself at least 1-year to really make a change. If you change one limiting belief every month, you will have a different personality at the end of a year. New personality = new personal reality.
• Keep learning. Knowledge is an antidote to ignorance and bad choices.
• Never set perfect as your target. Set your aim for GREAT. Perfect’s best friend is Ms Stressed Out (as opposed to Ms Fun-To-Be-Around). Drop the ‘P’ word all together.
• Get help if you are struggling. I like the saying: ‘Never worry alone’.
I know I talk about beliefs a lot. That is because they are ground zero. They not only cause us to feel certain things and act certain ways, but they cause our cells to express different genes in different ways. They impact the building blocks of our bodies in a very physical and real way. They are one of the main gateways to optimum health and healing.
Your task for today (if you want to improve the quality of your life ;-))
Note when something bothers you today. Be it a person, a situation, an object, or a memory.
Then ask yourself, while paying particular attention, “What is the story I am telling myself that causes me to feel this way?”
I can say with 100% certainty that it is the STORY (or belief or meaning you give things) that is causing you the discomfort – as opposed to the thing OUT THERE. Challenge the ‘story’.
Feel free to share what you observed to me personally (just reply to this email) or if you are feeling courageous, throw it up on my Facebook Page to help us all learn by your experience and to let us know we are not the odd one out. 😉